Random last thoughts, liners and glimmers"...
Hoping you all had a good year. Seeing the end of 2022 cannot happen fast enough for me, hoping next year will be a better one, as I'm pretty certain it can't be worse. (Or at least thats what I'm hoping). 2022 has been painful for many people I know, as well...Many suffered loved ones dying, some suffering with other personal losses. Whatever your experience of this year, hoping there will be much joy ahead for us all. I'm an optimist and I'm backing this plan of a wonderful 2023! And I believe, Karma counts!
Glimmers... Today I woke up to a text from my friend that lives in New Mexico. I got to know her through the RR community and she has become very dear to me. When I see her face on the screen my heart sings and I feel a warmth of kindness come through. She works as an attachment therapist there, so she also carries other peoples' sadnesses through her work. The two of us have both had a painful year. Before today I've never heard of 'glimmers', but it does make so much sense to rewire our brains for hope. After receiving this text (and photos) from her, I thought it was so beautiful and asked her permission to share this lovely descriptive message. She agreed and this is what it said...
"Hi, Amiga. I have recently learned about glimmers, which are instant reminders of hope, safety and delight (counterpart to triggers as instant reminders of threat). Taking a few extra micromoments to savor these glimmers accumulates and compounds to rewire our brains for resilience!
On emotionally tough Christmas at the end of grueling year, looking for glimmers on purpose, combined with self-forgiveness practice, completely shifted the way I was relating to this pain.
Glimmers abounded on Tree Springs Trail on Sandia Mountain overlooking Albuquerque: smoky lavender snow shadows, firs and spruces glistening in the sun, the feel of snow crunching beneath my boots, mountain views inviting new perspectives and context, a tiny evergreen on the mountaintop, crisp cool fresh winter air, being snuggled in my huge sleeping bag coat like a swaddled baby, hot holiday blend teas waiting in car to warm us.
It’s a practice of holding both/and—yes, this hurts, and yes, this is lovely—at the same time. It feels like another way to orient to equanimity heart practice. ♥️🌟💫✨❤️"
She accompanied this message of hope with these photos.
I dont know about you, but I will in future try to savour the 'glimmers' I see in life. I look for them now. Thank you Jodi for this lesson and the reminder of the 'glimmers' we can all see.
Life is too short... Human beings need food and water, but we also need human connection to survive. I am grateful for those in my life who have stood by me through it all. I'm so grateful for all the wonderful people I've come to know in my life. If we connect to anyone through our lives, no doubt we will also suffer losses.
One of my close friends, "P" (as I call her), experienced a great loss recently. Recently she lost one of her closest childhood friends unexpectedly at the age of 55. The woman simply dropped dead. The cause of death is unknown. And she wasn't sick. And it wasn't suicide. My friend, was notified of her dear friend, Wendys' sudden passing just before Xmas. Needless to say, "P"s heart is broken. She also seems to be looking at life a little differently nowadays.
In 2021 I got to meet "P"s friend Wendy as we spent my birthday together. Wendy, was visiting "P" at the time, from her home in Alabama. Although Wendy had a tough life, she seemed strong and laughed often. "P" has known her for many years, and still cannot believe Wendy is gone, and wont be around to share their lives any longer. But I know for sure she will always hold Wendy in her heart, and keep the colourful memories of the adventures they shared alive in the stories that she shares of Wendy. RIP Wendy. 💜
My birthday in 2021, with B, Wendy, P and me.
Sudden death can really shake us up to our core. Since Wendys' unexpected death, "P" calls me more often and always tells me that she loves me before the end of our call. She didn't do that before Wendys death. I cannot put into words how deeply this touches me when she does this. Those three words can really make a difference in someones day. Reminds me of the following reading by an unknown author: "You never really know the true impact you have on those around you. You never know how much someone needed that smile you gave them. You never know how much your kindness turned someones entire life around. You never know how much someone needed that long hug or deep talk. So dont wait to be kind. Dont wait for someone else to be kind first. Dont wait for better circumstances or for someone to change. Just be kind, because you never know how much someone needs it."
Speaking of Kindness...
That reading also reminds me of a film I saw about kindness. I recently shared with a group in RR that I am giving up on kindness. I feel that when I'm kind to others, (as thats my natural impulse), it only gets me hurt. So I thought I'd have a new plan for the future and not be so kind anymore. Its my natural impulse because it was modelled to me by my parents. My parents were very kind people. I think my mother was the kindest person ever. Possibly too kind. And for those who are reading this that knew her, I know you'd agree. As I was sharing my future plan with this group, my friend Jay stepped in and said something like "I dont think even if you tried, you could pull that off". And then he advised me to watch this 75 year old film, "Its a Wonderful Life". He said, after I watch it, I must text him to let him know what I thought. After I watched the film, I texted him and told him that I loved this film. So much so that I watched it twice in a week! It really shows what kindness brings to people and how it can change lives, and the world for the better. And it shows what life would be like without it. This film also says...“no man is a failure who has friends.” Thats for sure! A big thank you to Jay, for insisting I see this film. It will be in my heart and mind!
Though 2022 was a painful year of loss, discovery, growth and healing for me, there were several bright moments sprinkled in the past year as well. And for these moments I stay grateful. When I feel down, there are a couple ways I get myself to feel better. One is to turn the music on loud and lay on the floor and feel it, and another can be to flip through my phone photos and revisit all the fun I've had. The following pics are a few of those iPhone photos with some of the best moments, and some of my fave people from 2022. 💜
Random liners, I like...
Treat yourself like you treat others. - me (my new rule! :))
Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets. So love the people who treat you right and forget about those who dont.
If you find someone who makes you smile. Who checks up on you often to see if youre okay, who watches out for you and wants the best for you, who loves and respects you, dont let them go. People like that are hard to find. - Franz Kafta
Missing someone is how your heart lets you know how much you love them.
Sometimes it takes sadness to know happiness, noise to appreciate silence and absence to value presence.
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
Sometimes things that hurt you most, teach you the greatest lesson in life. - Buddha
How people treat you is their karma. How you react is yours. - Wayne Dyer
Take time to meditate and thank yourself for doing so.
Love yourself.
Listen to your heart.
Be grateful. Be grateful. Be grateful.
So here we are, first day of 2023. The Music Soup wishes everyone peace, joy, health, happiness, recovery from pain and suffering, and oodles of kindness everywhere!
Tell the people you love, that you love them! Tell them today because they may not be here tomorrow. Life is sooooo unpredictable!
Listen to lots of music and listen loud! Let it swim through your soul!
Remember..."Life is short...break the rules, forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably, and never regret anything that made you smile".
With peace, love, art and music,
Cheryl ☮❤️🎵